More lessons from Star Trek

So, I'm sitting on the couch trying to teach myself to knit (again).  It's going pretty well - I'm doing a long-tail cast-on courtesy of this video.  I decided I wanted background TV - this requires something relatively familiar that I can process but also sort of ignore.  So, I chose Star Trek for the simple reasons that a)  I've seen every episode dozens of times; b) it will annoy be payback for someone constantly mocking my Trekkie-ness.*

I chose the episode Miri, which is among the ones I like best.  Aside from the "ooh, Earth-like planet" = we ran out of production money, lesson, there are a few others to be noted from this one.

1. Are we sure that at the beginning, when they first get down to the planet and get attacked by the "creature" shrieking "mine, mine!" that they didn't actually find one of the few remaining academics left on the planet?  Seriously - unkempt white hair, raggedy clothing, unwashed, demanding, clingy, irrational.  Yeah.
2. Kirk and Miri tread a weird line of pedophilia and gerontophilia. I mean, she's 13, but also 313.   Or, possibly, I've just spent far too much time on the internet.  Even he acknowledges it at the end of the episode when he's all like "I never get involved with older women."
3. As I've mentioned before, the remastering really highlights the terrible makeup.  I'm guessing that it was probably at least partially necessary for decent appearance on average 1960s-era television sets.  I need to test this theory by viewing color shows of the same vintage.  Any suggestions? 
4. Shatner giving Miri the "you're becoming a woman" talk is seriously awkward.  Thank the deity of your choice we were spared "Soon...there...will....be...blood-coming-from-your-girl-parts..."
5. What the hell is up with Yeoman Rand's hair?     Like, does she spend hours every morning doing that basket-weave thing in the front of her beehive, or do they have super-special hair-weaving (literally) technology in the 23rd Century?  And if so, is it really standard equipment on a starship?  And isn't that style somehow a violation of OSHA or something?  I can think of numerous reasons why that style is a bad idea:

- random alien creatures could fly into it and be   killed

- it could become a nest for alien creatures

- it presents a large target for weapons fire

- it may frighten other sentient beings (it sure as   hell frightens me)

- there is no way that would fit under a space helmet unless they make special "big hair" ones

- it's hideous

Also, among the best quotes from this episode:

• Back on the ship, I always tried to get you to look at my legs... - Rand.  (Dude, in the mini-dress uniform how the hell could he NOT look at your legs or your underwear?)
• No more blah, blah, blah! - Kirk.  (Totally need this one next time I go to a lecture)
• Bonk!  Bonk on the head! - the children.  (Indeed, children.  Indeed.)

*Yes, "trekkie"  and get off my damn lawn.

- image courtesy of Wikipedia