Psyching Up

Tomorrow I have what I hope is my last appointment with my current neurologists.  I plan on firing their asses.  I'm really hoping this doesn't turn into a ridiculous drama-fest, primarily because that will take a lot of my energy.  And I'd rather not be labeled a "problem patient."
Anyway, the initial plan is to tell them that, after over a year, I just don't feel like we have or are going to establish a comfortable rapport and that I want to be referred to one of their colleagues, preferably someone who specializes in movement disorders.
I expect they will attempt to talk me out of it or make excuses.  I've been practicing saying, "yes, I understand that, I still want you to make the referral."
I figure I'll give them about three "bbbbut...." episodes before I suggest that if they have a problem doing as I ask that maybe we should bring in the clinic coordinator.
I intend to try very hard not to turn this into a long list of why I have a problem with them and what I think they've done wrong.  I would prefer this to end as painlessly as possible.
I also plan to *insist* on having the referral appointment made before I leave the office, given their track record at forgetting to and failing to do things like set up follow-up appointments, labs, inform me of test results, etc. even after I nag them.

Wish me luck.

Home already, round one of testing complete!

We managed to get the second part of our appointment done earlier today, so we're already home.  Things went very smoothly - not even a hint of panic for me!  The EMG did show some myopathy and paresis in my thigh muscle.  We'll see what more gets made of that.  I actually found the nerve conduction test sort of entertaining - being shocked makes me giggle, or maybe it was my leg moving without me doing anything.

The EMG with the needle was not the most pleasant thing ever, but wasn't too bad.  My hugely nerdy self couldn't help but think the sound of my muscles sounded awesomely like the feed from a radio-telescope.  *Hiss-crackle-crackle*

Anyway, I'm super-proud of myself for not being a total wuss.  I definitely couldn't have done it without the hubby there.  

Still a little bit sore from the tests and I really need to wash the EEG goo out of my hair.  Tomorrow is the MRI - no worries about that really, I've done it twice before and have the drill down.  So long as I'm lying down when they put the IV in, I'm cool.

The plan for the rest of this rainy day is, I think, to chill out at home.  If it weren't raining, I would be all about a trip to the zoo, but not so much.  Maybe later in the year.

Stupid Hands

Today is being an especially bad day for my hands.  My joints are aching pretty badly and I'm getting random shooting pains.  The last 2 fingers on my right hands are twitching randomly (typing is way  exciting).  And both hands are faintly numb/tingly - the best comparison I can come up with is how your hands might feel after driving an older diesel vehicle for an extended time.  My husband says motorcycle handlebars will do the same thing sometimes.  This is annoying as crap, but not really a big deal.

One of the issues I frequently have these days is figuring out whether I should not do something when I'm in pain.  Ordinarily I take pain as a message from my body saying "Hey, stupid, that's bad, quit it." or "Hey, stupid, you've done that too much, take a break."  Now, though, it seems that my brain randomly decides that something hurts like I did way too many lunges, pulled a moderately heavy person to safety over a cliff, dangled from a tall building using only my hands, participated in a hula-hooping marathon, or tried to crash a door open using only my head, even when my activity for the day has consisted of getting out of bed, brushing my teeth,  coaxing Oreo out of bed, and eating some yogurt.  So, I now have to question whether this is really a stop/break situation or a brain-being-a-punk situation.  I tend toward the stop/break more frequently because even if undertaking or continuing a certain activity probably isn't causing damage, it does still HURT.  Unfortunately, that also means that I don't do a lot of things I'd like to do.  I'm slowly learning when to push and when not to, but it's very much trial-and-error.

Anyway, I think I'm going to try (operative word being try) to keep typing to a minimum today to see if that helps (and because I'm sick of fixing typos because my fingers won't go where I want them to). So, I'll probably be light on content again today. I'm debating whether to pick up some crocheting.   I'm sorely tempted to just relax on the couch and read.